49 Days

It's been 49 days since my friend Barbie died. In Buddhist tradition, 49 days is the intermittent time (or Bardo) between incarnations. I think it is extremely auspicious that today is the 49th day, because of the rebirth associations of Christmas. Aside from Bodhi Day, I can't think of a more auspicious day.

It is traditional to burn an image of the dead as a symbolic gesture. I walked off and forgot the picture I had set on my shrine, but my wonderful husband took care of it for me.

As I sit and write this, I started feeling sad. I teared up. I feel that sorrowful attachment that we feel when someone we love dies. But that is the nature of suffering, and craving.
"I will never see her again; so I am sad."

But when I clicked the upload for her photo, I felt this immense sense of happiness.
I am happy for her. Because she was such a good person, and brought so much to those that knew her. I know that there is something better for her, becasue that is the nature of karma. She deserves a better life.

Because those people that should have been there for her, and set good examples for her, failed her. I won't point fingers and say nasty things, because that would be wrong, and ultimately, they have lost a beautiful bright spot in their lives, and I know they recognise this. It is a shame that she died, but I know, she is going to have a better life.



May Barbie Goodman have happiness and the causes of happiness.


May she be free from suffering and the causes of suffering.


May she never be separated from bliss.


May she remain in equanimity, free of bias, attachment and anger.





This is a restatement of the Four Immeasurables for my friend.
Namaste. my friend.